Together, Churches Expand Care for Those with Memory Loss

Bob’s feet were dancing, though he was sitting in the folding chair. I could see them moving in time to the music as I sat behind him and I knew that he must have been a good dancer in his day. I got up from where I was sitting, walked around to the front row, and stood in front of Bob. “Would you like to dance?” I asked, smiling and reaching for his hand. “I’m not very good anymore,” he said, “but yes, I would.”
Bob and I danced together and he was very good. Though he is two decades my senior and struggles with memory loss, the dance moves came easily to him. He and I laughed as he twirled me around. I felt like a teenager again.
At the Gathering Place,® people with Alzheimer’s and other forms of memory loss come together with others for a time of positive social activities such as dancing, singing, crafting, enjoying entertainment, and visiting with others in an accepting and loving environment. While they are there, their loved ones who care for them are able to enjoy a time away from the demands of caregiving. It’s a ministry that more than 50 ecumenical congregations have taken on and it is unique to Houston. Of these diverse congregations, five are Episcopal churches: St. Martin’s, Emmanuel, St. Francis, St. John the Divine, and most recently, St. Paul’s, Katy.
Volunteers from each congregation form a team that is trained and supported by Interfaith CarePartners®, a non-profit organization formed in 1985 to care for vulnerable people in Houston. Interfaith CarePartners also provides a way to coordinate the many Gathering Places across the city so people like Bob can attend all the Gathering Places that are offered near their home. Each congregational team hosts one three-and-a-half hour Gathering Place each month.
Shirley McAllister, a member of St. Martin’s, has been on its Gathering Place team for 17 years. McAllister said she gets much by serving: “The feeling of helping, not only the person with Alzheimer’s, but their family [feels good]. Knowing that they are giving 24 hours a day, we can help by giving a few hours. It’s a good witness. We kind of forget that.”
Another St. Martin’s team member, Carlene Warren, has a constant smile and her energy invites others to feel welcome. Warren spoke about what it is like to care for people with memory loss in this setting. “I love them,” she said, adding, “A lot of these folks grew up dancing a lot in the earlier years and so I feel like dancing brings that feeling of joy to them. Music heals all of our souls, not just theirs, but ours. There’s a connection … it connects us all together.”
That connection between the Gathering Place team and the CarePartners like Bob, who attend each month, and the families grows strong over the years. Tina Adame, whose husband David attended the St. Martin’s Gathering Place, said, “David came to the very first Gathering. After the first few, he would sit by the window waiting for his ride to come. It’s because of the Gathering Place that he lived to 95! If it hadn’t been for this, David would have been gone.”
Through tears she continued, “I always said that the day he couldn’t go to the Gatherings he would be gone. Robin Bruce began to pick him up to take him to all the Gatherings. After he was no longer able to go, he died within six months. Carlene and Kathy Tellepsen (St. Martin’s Gathering Place Team Leader) continue to check on me. I am so blessed!”
Gathering Places are held across the greater Houston area. Caregivers interested in locating Gathering Places or churches interested in participating in the program are encouraged to contact Interfaith CarePartners at 713.682.5995 or InterfaithCarePartners.org.
Pettit is a Care Team Coordinator with CarePartners and a member of St. Paul’s, Katy.
Bob and I danced together and he was very good. Though he is two decades my senior and struggles with memory loss, the dance moves came easily to him. He and I laughed as he twirled me around. I felt like a teenager again.
At the Gathering Place,® people with Alzheimer’s and other forms of memory loss come together with others for a time of positive social activities such as dancing, singing, crafting, enjoying entertainment, and visiting with others in an accepting and loving environment. While they are there, their loved ones who care for them are able to enjoy a time away from the demands of caregiving. It’s a ministry that more than 50 ecumenical congregations have taken on and it is unique to Houston. Of these diverse congregations, five are Episcopal churches: St. Martin’s, Emmanuel, St. Francis, St. John the Divine, and most recently, St. Paul’s, Katy.
Volunteers from each congregation form a team that is trained and supported by Interfaith CarePartners®, a non-profit organization formed in 1985 to care for vulnerable people in Houston. Interfaith CarePartners also provides a way to coordinate the many Gathering Places across the city so people like Bob can attend all the Gathering Places that are offered near their home. Each congregational team hosts one three-and-a-half hour Gathering Place each month.
Shirley McAllister, a member of St. Martin’s, has been on its Gathering Place team for 17 years. McAllister said she gets much by serving: “The feeling of helping, not only the person with Alzheimer’s, but their family [feels good]. Knowing that they are giving 24 hours a day, we can help by giving a few hours. It’s a good witness. We kind of forget that.”
Another St. Martin’s team member, Carlene Warren, has a constant smile and her energy invites others to feel welcome. Warren spoke about what it is like to care for people with memory loss in this setting. “I love them,” she said, adding, “A lot of these folks grew up dancing a lot in the earlier years and so I feel like dancing brings that feeling of joy to them. Music heals all of our souls, not just theirs, but ours. There’s a connection … it connects us all together.”
That connection between the Gathering Place team and the CarePartners like Bob, who attend each month, and the families grows strong over the years. Tina Adame, whose husband David attended the St. Martin’s Gathering Place, said, “David came to the very first Gathering. After the first few, he would sit by the window waiting for his ride to come. It’s because of the Gathering Place that he lived to 95! If it hadn’t been for this, David would have been gone.”
Through tears she continued, “I always said that the day he couldn’t go to the Gatherings he would be gone. Robin Bruce began to pick him up to take him to all the Gatherings. After he was no longer able to go, he died within six months. Carlene and Kathy Tellepsen (St. Martin’s Gathering Place Team Leader) continue to check on me. I am so blessed!”
Gathering Places are held across the greater Houston area. Caregivers interested in locating Gathering Places or churches interested in participating in the program are encouraged to contact Interfaith CarePartners at 713.682.5995 or InterfaithCarePartners.org.
Pettit is a Care Team Coordinator with CarePartners and a member of St. Paul’s, Katy.
Aging Is Changing: Preface for Older Adult Ministries Guide

by The Rt. Rev. Rayford B. High, Jr.
It should come as no surprise to us that our population is aging. Presently, there are more people age 65 and older living in the U.S. than the total population of Canada, and by 2030, there will be about 72.1 million older persons living in the U.S.
The oldest Baby Boomers are reaching 65 years this year. Every day, for the next 19 years, about 10,000 more will join this throng. By numbers alone, this group will redefine old age in America. However, many Boomers are in good health and feel younger than their years. Recent economic changes have cut short retirement plans or decimated retirement income.
The Charter for Lifelong Formation, adopted by General Convention 2009, calls for the church to invite, inform and inspire Christians their whole life-long.
I was rector of a larger downtown parish and proposed to the vestry to undertake the Meals on Wheels ministry, using our own kitchen and parish volunteers to cook and deliver three meals a week for 15-25 people, 52 weeks a year. Most of the volunteers were our older members! They were overjoyed to have a ministry opportunity they could do.
More often than not, they would look at the proposed menus and say, “Well, that doesn’t look too tasty so why don’t we add some of this and some of that,” and one would say, “I’ll go home and get some of this to add to the food.” They were creative in the kitchen, had fun and felt they were a small part of God’s plan to do God’s will. They were given an opportunity to serve and serve they did!
Older adults have wisdom, history, gifts to offer and “The Story” as it has played out in their lives. We cannot afford to lose this treasure. How can we find meaningful ways for our older adults to live as faithful disciples through liturgy, study, service, witness and community without being burdened with institutional maintenance tasks that can turn church into yet another demand? How can we make ministry of and for this population easy?
Older adults may not like meetings at night. They may not be able to drive at night or are afraid of going home alone. They many need larger print, better lighting and enhanced audio quality. They may live far from families and grandchildren and may welcome the opportunity to be with a spread of ages. Older adults can take responsibility for their own learning and want their life experiences to be valued and integrated into this learning. Frailer older adults may not be able to be active participants in their congregations, but they do have a continuing need, and responsibility to learn and to teach.
Older adults have different levels of faith formation just as other ages do. It is wonderful that these new resources take this fact into consideration.
Let us be open to the Holy Spirit to lead us in ministry and not be afraid of where this may take us. Let us not be afraid to ask older members to take on a servant ministry. Let us find ways to encourage them and give them the opportunity to share their stories with the entire congregation. Let us seize the moment to reach out and explore, with our older members, ways to continue our life-long learning and faith development pilgrimage.
We promise at every Baptism we attend that we will continue in fellowship, the Eucharist, teaching and learning, seeing Christ in others, forgiving others and spreading the good news. St. Paul reminds us in I Corinthians 12 of the variety of gifts God has bestowed on each of us for ministry. And at our Baptism and Confirmation we have been empowered to serve Christ and his people, using these gifts. There is no age limit on these promises.
This group of Disciples is an invaluable resource in Christ’s ministry. I urge you to invite, ask and encourage our older sisters and brothers into ministry, and I’ll bet you will be surprised and overjoyed.
Download the entire guide.
Aging: A New Field of Ministry for Churches
From AgeWell.Com, sponsored by the University of Alabama Center for Aging Although many churches and religious groups now operate ministries and outreach programs for the older members of their congregations, Dr. Michael Parker, who works in the areas of gerontology, geriatrics and palliative care with the UAB Center for Aging, says there's much more that could be done to help their communities with strategies for successful aging: "I think the church can be far more actively engaged right now in addressing the needs of its aging congregations," Parker says. "But therein rests part of the problem. Many churches think of older people in this context: 'old, frail, and dependent.' As in, 'How can we help you?' And most older people prefer not to be thought of in that manner. "And because they've lived longer and have had diverse experiences, wonderful vocational careers, I believe that they should be thought of as leaders. As sources of information, and of wisdom. As people who can mentor younger people. Who can, in their 'retirement years,' be actively engaged in the pursuit of benevolent works. "So the church…I'm talking about the church universal…needs to re-think how it conceptualizes growing old. We really do need a 'theology of aging' that speaks to the power and might that comes with wisdom. And having experienced the seasons of life in such a way that their wisdom can be brought to bear on others, and to help others…not just in spiritual ways, but in practical ways. "For example, we've done a number of things in the context of the church. We've put on a 'Successful Aging' Conference at the University of Alabama, for which about 60 churches collaborated across denominations, in partnership with two major universities, to put on a series of seminars and training workshops about how one ages successfully. But the overarching perspective of that conference was to counter the notion that to be old is to be frail and dependent. And to put in its place this idea that's much more accurate, I think, that our elderly, our senior citizens, have so much to offer. |
We think about the World War II generation as being 'the greatest generation,' but we think about that work as something that was done in the past. We don't think about all that the World War II generation could bring to bear today. And yet they have the same capacities and qualities that have been enriched through the years to bring to bear on social issues of the day.
"One great opportunity for the church rests in the area of care-giving. Right now, care-giving falls to people who are at midlife. And that's generally thought of as people who are between the ages of 33 and 60. We've had to enlarge that range of what we consider midlife because people are living so long. And there's a biblical mandate to honor your mother and father. In fact, all the world's religions speak to the importance of that. But the church is not engaged in assisting people to do that, in the way it could be. "Caring for an aging parent is simply part of life, and it's something that should be prepared for. Much like you might for, say, a child's college education. We need to be talking with our parents, and our parents need to be talking with us, pro-actively, before it's too late, to work out very specific plans that deal with a variety of legal and financial and spiritual and family issues. And the church could be a part of that whole educational process. The whole end-of-life issue is so interesting…people don't realize how important it is that we prepare for the end of life. Most people think they're going to go quick in the night. Unfortunately, it's more likely for most of us to be kind of a prolonged process. And if we want to have some say-so in how that process unfolds, we need to plan ahead…with end-of-life directives, for example, and the church could be a part of that educational process. "The church could help with such medical tasks as helping families locate a trained, qualified geriatric physician. We have a very rich resource in that area, here at UAB. The church could also help with legal tasks, something as simple as developing a durable power of attorney with a health care proxy, or helping locate a qualified ElderLaw attorney. "The church could be involved in concerns such as a family member realizing 'I don't think Mama should be driving any more," and could help the family connect with a program such as the UAB Driver Assessment Clinic. "The church could also be involved, for instance, in helping family members to get a history from a senior, before dementia hits or a stroke incapacitates a person. The church could help families get that audio or video history, and give assistance with how to do a 'life review' of a loved one. That would be a gift that would continue to give, throughout the future." A downloadable audio file of Dr. Parker's article is also available. |
Senior Adult Facts
compiled by Dr. Alma Belzer
FACTOID # 1
The unprecedented rapid growth of the older adult population nationwide and worldwide, and the resultant burden on the social and economic system demands that the church address this crisis. Currently 1 in every 8 Americans is age 65 or older and over 1 in 4 of these seniors live alone. Every hour, 330 Americans reach the age of 60. In two years, these same "baby boomers" will start turning 65. Every 10 years, the age 85+ population increases by 40%.
FACTOID # 2
Older Americans Month began when President John F. Kennedy designated May 1963 as Senior Citizens Month, encouraging the nation to pay tribute in some way to older people across the country. In 1980, President Jimmy Carter's proclamation changed the name to Older Americans Month, a time to celebrate those 65+ through ceremonies, events and public recognition. The following is a quote from President Carter's book, The Virtues of Aging, "We worry too much about something to live on -- and too little about something to live for."
FACTOID # 3
Over one in four people age 65+ live alone. Half of women age 75+ live alone. Only 4% of the 65+ age group live in nursing facilities and over half of them receive no visitors. The majority of older adults live with relatives. More than eight out of ten long-term care services are provided by unpaid family caregivers. One in three family caregivers caring for older relatives are themselves aged 65+.
FACTOID # 4
Every minute of the day, three older adults are treated in the emergency department for a fall. Every hour, falls result in the death of two older adults. Every year, one in three persons over age 75 fall and 20% of these will have a moderate-to-severe injury. Persons who fall once are highly likely to have a second fall. See www.fallprevention.org for ways to reduce falls in the community. WHAT DOES THIS MEAN TO YOU AND YOUR CHURCH?
FACTOID # 5
"According to U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, as many as 214,000 Americans could be 100 or older by 2010. By 2050, that number could exceed 4,200,000." What may be more surprising is the fact that the fastest growing segment of our population is the 85+ age group! The ten states with the highest percentage of the total U.S. population are California (10.1%), New York (8.4%), Florida, Texas, Pennsylvania, Illinois, Ohio, New Jersey, Massachusetts and Michigan. That Florida is only 24th when it has the largest share of those age 65+ may be because the state attracts the healthier "young old" while those much older return to their origin state to be cared for by their families. Some states across the country are following Oklahoma's lead in forming a "Centenarian Club" to honor and celebrate the hundreds of hundred-year-olds in their state! www.ckokc.org/centenarian-club-of-oklahoma . How can the consideration of these facts impact planning for senior adults in your congregations and communities?
This handout was provided as an attachment to the Adult Education Newsletter published by LeaderResources, Spring 2009.
FACTOID # 1
The unprecedented rapid growth of the older adult population nationwide and worldwide, and the resultant burden on the social and economic system demands that the church address this crisis. Currently 1 in every 8 Americans is age 65 or older and over 1 in 4 of these seniors live alone. Every hour, 330 Americans reach the age of 60. In two years, these same "baby boomers" will start turning 65. Every 10 years, the age 85+ population increases by 40%.
FACTOID # 2
Older Americans Month began when President John F. Kennedy designated May 1963 as Senior Citizens Month, encouraging the nation to pay tribute in some way to older people across the country. In 1980, President Jimmy Carter's proclamation changed the name to Older Americans Month, a time to celebrate those 65+ through ceremonies, events and public recognition. The following is a quote from President Carter's book, The Virtues of Aging, "We worry too much about something to live on -- and too little about something to live for."
FACTOID # 3
Over one in four people age 65+ live alone. Half of women age 75+ live alone. Only 4% of the 65+ age group live in nursing facilities and over half of them receive no visitors. The majority of older adults live with relatives. More than eight out of ten long-term care services are provided by unpaid family caregivers. One in three family caregivers caring for older relatives are themselves aged 65+.
FACTOID # 4
Every minute of the day, three older adults are treated in the emergency department for a fall. Every hour, falls result in the death of two older adults. Every year, one in three persons over age 75 fall and 20% of these will have a moderate-to-severe injury. Persons who fall once are highly likely to have a second fall. See www.fallprevention.org for ways to reduce falls in the community. WHAT DOES THIS MEAN TO YOU AND YOUR CHURCH?
FACTOID # 5
"According to U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, as many as 214,000 Americans could be 100 or older by 2010. By 2050, that number could exceed 4,200,000." What may be more surprising is the fact that the fastest growing segment of our population is the 85+ age group! The ten states with the highest percentage of the total U.S. population are California (10.1%), New York (8.4%), Florida, Texas, Pennsylvania, Illinois, Ohio, New Jersey, Massachusetts and Michigan. That Florida is only 24th when it has the largest share of those age 65+ may be because the state attracts the healthier "young old" while those much older return to their origin state to be cared for by their families. Some states across the country are following Oklahoma's lead in forming a "Centenarian Club" to honor and celebrate the hundreds of hundred-year-olds in their state! www.ckokc.org/centenarian-club-of-oklahoma . How can the consideration of these facts impact planning for senior adults in your congregations and communities?
This handout was provided as an attachment to the Adult Education Newsletter published by LeaderResources, Spring 2009.